You are going to fail at practicing spiritual disciplines. There’s really no way around it.
I know we tell ourselves that we’re going to read our Bibles, pray, journal, open our homes or adopt some new and vital spiritual practice “for real” this time, but eventually all of us stall out. We get sick, go on a trip, have a few bad days and what we began with the most noble intentions, falls far short of what we envisioned.
Legalism is the worst feeling in the world. I know from experience.
Even a 5-year-old who’s right about everything can still mix up his shoes.
One of the great oddities of my life is that I can’t remember anything before I turned five. I’m pretty sure that means I need therapy. My memories start at five. I have memories from church when I was five. I started playing Jr. Tee-ball when I was five. I remember going to my best friend, Kendrick’s, birthday party when I was five; but I don’t remember anything before then.
What I remember most about five was my kindergarten. I remember arriving early each day. My dad would drop me off on his way to work. I was usually the 1st student there. Everyday, I’d hop out of his 1974 yellow Ford Pinto (that car was ballin’!), and I would sit in the corner of the large playroom. As other kids arrived they would get out toys and play together, but I just sat in the corner, wedged between a large, worn, brown, particle board bookshelf and an even larger counter.
I would sit there and sing songs to myself. Most songs I had learned in church: “Softly and Tenderly,” “Oh, Why Not Tonight,” “Just as I Am”, etc….I suppose I had a thing for “invitation songs”. But I never really engaged the other kids at school. I kept to myself and hardly ever played with anybody. Why? The kindergarten I went to was a “Baptist” kindergarten.
I had been taught – by the time I was five – that only the people who went to my church were real Christians. I knew at five that those “evil Baptists,” with their instrumental music, choir robes, and “pastors” – not preachers – weren’t the kind of people I was supposed to be around.
In fact, before my parents enrolled me in school, I overheard them “discussing” it, so I knew I ought to be concerned and prepared to not let the Baptists co-opt the purity of my faith. That Christmas as the kindergarten was preparing for the Christmas pageant, I was vehemently opposed – I said that too: “I’m vehemently opposed” (I had an advanced vocabulary for five). I didn’t want to participate in this unbiblical, man-made tradition. It was something “the denominations” did.
By the time I was five, I had become a hard-core, dyed-in-the-wool sectarian. At five, I was a Jr. theologian. I had figured out how it all should work. As a child, there was no way for me to know how childish that was.
It wasn’t until four years ago that I realized there was an “official” young minister’s uniform. If you don’t believe me, try this experiment: Go to Christian conference. It was at a conference in Southern California I first saw “the uniform” – designer, distressed jeans, something akin to Buddy Holly glasses, a plaid shirt with pearl snaps, about 1,000lbs of hair gel, and a Moleskine journal. It’s kind of a cool look. The clothes say, “I’m hip, relevant, and in touch.” The glasses and Moleskine Journal
When I discovered there was a uniform I simultaneously discovered that I wear the uniform – save the hair gel. My natural taste, consciously, and desire to fit in, unconsciously, had delivered to my closet trappings of the young pastor uniform. I’m fine with it. After all, every occupation has typical couture that most folks wear.
Hipster Be Square
My life is busy. I don’t wear this as a badge of honor. It’s a weakness, a flaw. Over time, though, I’ve managed to discover some tools (programs and apps) that help my life run more smoothly. I use these programs and apps every day. Maybe they’ll help you too.
Byword – I write almost everything in ByWord. It’s sleek and minimalist. Using Markdown language, it’s only me and the text. I can worry about formatting later. When I get brainstorm, I have to get the words out quickly or risk losing them. ByWord let’s me do that. Plus, I can save a document to Dropbox and have access to it on my MacBookPro and/or iPad.
Scrivener – Well, I do almost all my writing in ByWord. Big projects – those with lots of references, resources, and chapters – get worked out in Scrivener. It’s great for keeping it all together in one place.
Google Drive – I’ve only recently started using Google Drive. It’s perfect for collaborating and – in my case – when you’re writing for someone else. The interface is smooth and you can upload and download all kinds of documents – graphics, powerpoint, and text. moving forward I can see Google Drive becoming more and more useful for me.
Workflowy – Worflowy is my brain. Everything is in it – ideas, to-do’s, projects, everything. Like ByWord it’s cloud based, so I have access to it everywhere
Reeder - I subscribe to 100′s of blogs and newspapers. Reeder feeds them to one place (syncing with my Google Reader).
Flipboard – If you have an iPad or iPad Mini, you MUST have Flipboard. Just downoad it now and thank me later.
Buffer App - I schedule my tweets through Buffer. It looks like I’m using Twitter and Facebook all day. I’m not. My Tweets and status changes are all in the que and ready for the day by 6:00am with a few exceptions.
Hootsuite – Facebook updates, LinkedIn post, and tweets for my personal and The Vine Church account goes through Hootsuite. It’s a wonderful company. I use them so much and rave about them so much they sent me a t-shirt and some stickers a while back. That cemented my loyalty.
Readability – Articles and blog post I want to spend more time with find their way to Readability. It just makes reading comfortable.
Evernote – Evernote serves, mainly, as my repository for brainstorming and electronic filing. Each of my sermons and writing projects for the next 4 months are stored in Evernote. As I find things that I might need, use, or find interesting, I file them away in Evernote. However, Worflowy (should I one day move to a paid account) will likely take it’s place.
Evernote Clearly – Web articles are too busy (ads, comments, etc…). Evernote Clearly is a web extension that “clears” away the gunk and junk and provides a clear reading experience. You can also clip articles directly in Evernote.
Spotify – Spotify is a music app that allows you to make your own playlist and keep them. In addition, you can listen to playlist created by others. This is A LOT of fun. Spotify has a free function (with commercials) or you can pay for a membership ($9.99 / months) which allows you to download playlist and listen on your smartphone or tablet.
Dropbox – This is essentially a hard drive in the sky. At The Vine this is the primary way we store information. Simple and easy.
Day One - As part of my daily spiritual formation, I’m reading The One Year Bible Compact Edition NIV
My Fitness Pal – I LOVE this app. I’ve not found a better way to track my daily calorie intake as well as keep a diary of exercise and fitness goals. You should be using this. Nearly every food, whether from a restaurant or grocery store is logged in. You’ll know exactly what you’re eating all the time. Plus, it syncs with the iPhone app, so there’s no excuse. The next time you’re at Whataburger about to download a #6 into your gut, you’ll know that’s more than half the calories you’ll need that day.
Go ahead and give some or all of these apps a try. With a wife, two kids, a blog, a church to love, book reviews, and writing projects, I’ve found these helpful.
What other great Apps are out there? What have I missed? Share in the comments section below.
“Ripped” entries are pages take verbatim (almost) from my spiritual journal. This year I’m working through The One Year Bible Compact Edition NIV
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I can’t read the story of Nadab and Abihu without thinking of “strange fire.” This little story tucked away in Leviticus 10, tells the story of the two brothers – sons of Aaron – who screwed up a worship service. God had just spent a lot of energy explaining to Moses exactly how the sacrificial system should work. The explanation is long, boring, and exact.
For their lackadaisical and casual approach to worship, God smote them (I really like the word smote). Anyway, growing up in Churches of Christ, this story was used as proof-texted about “Authorized Worship.” In short, we were supposed to use a particular level of exactitude when it comes to worship. Moreover, it meant that our particulars when it came to worship should be upheld and defended.
Ok. Whatever.
I have a theory when it comes to Biblical interpretation: If you, or your denomination, sees something that no one else sees, it’s probably wrong. Either that, or you have some super-special, magical insight that has escaped centuries of faithful, thoughtful, devoted Christian people. That being the case, I’m pretty sure Nadab and Abihu weren’t smote so that God could teach us not to use instruments in worship (which was the argument in my tribe.)
If that were the case, someone needs to explain how Leviticus 10 ends. Why? Because Aaron’s other, newly promoted sons, Eleazer and Ithamar, screw up a worship service themselves. They didn’t eat the offering as Moses instructed.
That’s the real heart of this story. The brothers don’t follow the rules, just like Nadab and Abihu. When they break form, the boys incur Moses’ wrath, “Why did you not eat the sin offering in the sacred area?…”
As the boys receive their dressing down, their dad, Aaron steps in to take the blow saying, “See today they offered their sin offering and their burnt offering before the Lord; and yet such things as these have befallen me! If I had eaten the sin offering today, would it have been agreeable to the Lord?”
In other words, “Step off, Moses! I’ve had two sons die today. We don’t feel like eating.”
What does the scripture say happened next? “And when Moses heard that, he agreed.”
I don’t care to imagine the pain of losing one of my children. Aaron lost two. And I suppose, it is completely in God’s province to wipe out Eleazar and Ithamar. They, like their brothers, failed to correctly perform the sacrifice. But God doesn’t smite them?
Don’t you wonder why?
I have to believe that God – both in God’s sovereignty and grace leaves room for grief.
Have you ever been around someone who is gripped by grief? If you have, you know they say all kinds of things…and so do the people around them. Much of what is said in the grip of grief is theologically unhelpful, stupid, and sometimes, bordering on sacrilegious. “Curse God and die.”
Often, when such words are uttered, the theology police jump in and say, “You can’t say that. You shouldn’t feel that way. Don’t be mad at God.” All the correction is well-meaning, but in choosing to guide raw emotions back to the safety of well-worn orthodoxy, our friends do to us what even God would not.
God allowed Aaron, Eleazar, and Ithmar to have their grief. Neither God nor Moses tried to fix anything. Neither tried to pacify Aaron with tales of pearly gates and streets of gold. God and Moses allow grief to be grief; to allow pain to be pain and live with the angst it creates.
I think Christians need to do that more. We so terribly dread the idea of raw emotions and honest feeling. I think it’s because many of us care so little for emotion, but that’s our problem.
The Lord is not afraid of our grief. And in the words of Aaron, if we behaved as if our grief wasn’t real, “would that be agreeable to the Lord?”
The answer from Leviticus 10 is no!
